eFail

Today, I did a very silly thing.

My entries thus far have all been written at work (exclusively in my own time, of course). It is only recently that I arrived upon the decision to publish them in a blog, as much for myself as anything. I knew that unless I had an audience (no matter how imagined) I would inevitably stop writing, and I didn't want to do that.

My writings had been jotted down in a word document, and when I came to the decision that I wanted to publish, I attached the document to an email and sent it home.

Imagine the sense of panic that set in when that same email got blocked by the work email quarantine system. For profanity. This meant that someone from I.T. would have to read the contents of the email and decide whether or not it was appropriate to release it. “Gulp” indeed.

For a while I wondered if the problem of what I should do with my life might have been solved for me, in dramatic fashion. But it seems lady luck was on my side, and a very kind member of the IT crowd released the email, even remarking that it was funny. My first ever review – and a good one! Relief, with a side order of pride.

It is telling of my state of mind that my first thought when this happened was that it would give me something to write about here. What a ridiculous fool I am.

My second thought was that perhaps it would force me into doing something about my situation. I was fairly confident that I wouldn’t be dismissed, but I was worried that there could be repercussions of some sort. I am distinctly aware that what I have written here could be taken badly if read out of context, and without the understanding that at least some of what I write will be embellished for effect.
But it didn't force me to do something, so I haven't. I am nothing if not consistent.

My third thought was for lunch. Because I was hungry, and it was about that time.